Being a bad people manager is easy, but improving isn’t hard.
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If you were to peep at Google’s search predictions (a.k.a. autocomplete), you might be convinced we’re all horribly inept at this whole people-managing gig.
Just type “my manager” into the familiar white box. In the predictions, there’s no “my manager is amazing,” or “…is a great leader,” or “…deserves to be nominated for an award.” Instead, we get a peek at just the beginnings of many sad workplace stories (see the feature image.) Tales of bullying, hate and gaslighting.
Are we really all deeply suffering at the hands of managers?
Probably, at some point, yes.
If you’re honest, you can likely remember a time when you suffered a dud manager. If you’re brutally honest, you may even admit to having been one. If you’re having a moment of absolute soul-cleansing honesty, perhaps you even know you are one. Not to worry, we’ve got this.
I was the poster child for dud managers once. Perhaps that’s being too hard on myself — in reality, I was just a first-time manager wading through the murky waters of early 2000s office culture. Nevertheless, if my direct reports back then had a dollar for every time I didn’t inspire them, they’d absolutely be chilling on some beach in Bali by now.
While rummaging through a box of relics recently, I stumbled upon a notebook with my scribbled work notes from that era. It was a little like unearthing a diary from your awkward teenage years — a bit cringe and many regrets.
Reading my notes back, I think my superpower was knowing I was, well, a bit crap at managing people. But also, having a drive to be better. Leadership has always come naturally, but being a leader and being a manager are different. Those cringey scribbles were my lifeline then and a reminder now to share those little nuggets I penned down because it doesn’t take much to boost a ‘how-to-not-suck-at-managing-people’ skillset.
So, how can we save a direct report from typing something horrible about us into a Google search out of frustration? Tackling this challenge begins with adopting some straightforward behaviors.